When you want so badly to just be happy.. not for yourself but for others.. and the pieces of your heart are so scattered you can't find the happy one.
If I could only go back... Times weren't easy. Life was complicated. But we were all together and it some how always worked out. I can save I don't think my babies ever had a bad Christmas
Completely get this!!!!
"Why my child? Why my family? Why did my child have to die?" These are valid questions that we all ask. We're discouraged from asking these questions because there are no valid answers. BUT, until we wrestle with these questions we will never be able to move from this part of grief. "Why did this happen?" We will never know -- at least not in this life. But, for me, it helps to know that others have walked this painful journey and have lived to tell it. In no way does it give me relief from my pain, but to know that others are walking this journey helps me. Above all, I continue to ask God to keep my heart from turning to stone. I want to feel life -- even with my pain. God bless all who are asking the question "why" today. It's the most painful question we will every ask. It's so hard to accept the fact that life is not fair. Bad things really do happen to very good people.
I am very thankful and grateful that God granted me 19 years with my beautiful little girl.. I am however at a complete loss without her. The blessing of my two angels, that I see now were showing me signs through out their lives that they just weren't going to be here as long as I breaks my heart.. from the photos of my two angels wearing their Angel shirts.. to their wishes at such young ages to be organ donors.. the conversations that were had.. to a cast I signed when De was two saying Mommy's Angel.
I am begging each of you .. no matter what the situation.. call your babies today.. just tell them that you love them and that they ARE a blessing to you, because one day you may be sitting here wondering if they knew how much you loved them.
How to know you haven't slept in days...
Drake: mom go get some sleep
Drake: I MEAN it.
Drake: I do not want to find you out here in the morning!
Who's the parent??? Ugh.
Surprise drive by hugs from Sandy Beach and my little Hayley bug! (Note to self. Clean the house so you don't spend 10 minutes throwing stuff around) love you guys so much!!!
Dude! The weird dreams you will have if you fall asleep with the TV on and preaching comes on. I could not figure out why this same man kept asking questions and wouldn't let is go eat. (Apparently I was hungry) but then I look and Matt Costa is the preacher. Then this dude is talking about how he was baptized as a baby but not as an adult but didn't think he should be now because he has cancer and is dying but has been cancer free for three years but he is still really sick and is worried the holy water has germs and will kill him... While he is smoking a cigarette in church!
My brain can not handle this craziness.
I have to believe. Believe there is a reason why. Believe I will one day understand. Believe that I will be ok. Believe the actions I have made are best for me. Believe that my heart will be healed. Believe I have surrounded my self with love and support. Believe that peace will come. Believe that peace will bring joy. Believe that forgiveness doesn't change another's heart only your own. Believe my angels are in heaven celebrating in paradise. Believe that I will be with them soon. I just have to BELIEVE! ~ Re
Random Musings from Facebook
My random status thoughts and love sent to me by others. Just a glimpse into the madness, sadness, and silliness of my mind.