I am thinking if it walks like a duck.. quakes like a duck.. yet smells like a rat.. it's probably a rat.
0 Comments
A friends post got me to thinking and I wanted to share this.
In school was far from popular. Well known maybe but not a popular beauty. I was a total outsider in every clique in school, but I got along with every one of them. I was on the out skirts of cliques and you know what? That is OK. If I had been in a clique I would not have the friends I do today. Memories of so many different groups growing up. The preps, the jocks, the rednecks, the cheerleaders, the honors and the let's skip school and partiers. But you know what the cool thing is? I don't fit in anywhere now either. .. I fit in everywhere. Because I am me, I am unique, and I am so open minded that I don't have much problem finding and meeting friends. For nine months my life has been a puzzle that was tossed up in the air. A puzzle I have had to pick up and put back together... I examined some pieces and they had to be reformed or removed for my new puzzle to work but I am finding that so many of you... your puzzle pieces fit better now than ever. For that I love my total smorgasbord of friends!!! Hate will not push out hate.
Only love can push out hate... I love there fore I react and hurt. Part of me being me. I should have known to call and talk to the wisest man in my life before deactivating.
I enjoy all of you. All of your posts and pictures. In the words of a very wise man do not do things because of someone foolish and do not react when they try to upset you. ... All you are doing is hurting yourself and making them happy." PS Mark Harvell and Edward Wesley he told me I should have called and asked what you both thought too lol. Xoxoxoxo" As I lay here with this headache that just won't quit my thoughts go to tomorrow. Nine months my baby girl has been gone. The same amount of time I carried her as close to my heart as one could get. The same amount of time I anticipated meeting her. Holding her. It feels strange that it now the same amount of time I have been anticipating meeting her in heaven and holding her again. Sadly I don't think it works that way. There is no full term time for meeting in heaven. No matter how much I wish there was. Apparently my job here is not done.
I just miss my sweet girl. How much things would be different right now. My love flies to you on the wings of angels my baby. Maybe that's why I was not in a puddle of tears last night....
God protects you from dangers seen and unseen. "When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell." Psalms 27:2 How blessed am I that my son is where I can look to see the light. The light of Jesus. At 16 he is more of a man than lots of grown people I know. He entered my name in the prayer requests today when I leaned over and said what did you say... He said mom I said you had a bad night, a bad week, a bad month, and a bad year... and next month is going to be so hard for you.
Love my boys. I am blessed with the most amazing friends and family! I will conquer this with their support and God
You may be struggling, but keep declaring, “I’m blessed. I’m prosperous. I have the favor of God.” Every time you say it, you’re getting closer to seeing that come to pass. Authors Note: This post was and IS fully directed at ONE person. I won't take it down. I won't remove it.. it is what it is.. she has poked and prodded me through the last few months and it MY time to take a stand. I am sick of it.. she has people convinced that I won't let this go.. but after this project of going through the days.. weeks.. and months since the accident and the pattern is there. I have REACTED to things that were done to me.. so there.. this post stands.
Author's Note 2: After this writing I received what I will call a very fake apology .. filled with a bunch of sugar coated bull. The bottom line a very manipulated apology in order to once again state she had done the right thing. The only person you are fooling is yourself by the way. I removed my last post because I was very hurt and angry when I posted. This is my outlet, some disagree with me using it as such and that's OK, but I let the hurt over ride my writing ability sometimes and this was one of those times. The bottom line is that this is my life, things have happened to me, some good, some bad, I have been very honest and open about my entire journey, the accident, the loss of not just one but two children, the stress, the ups, the strains on relationships and the depression. I reached out today to bridge a gap in one of those strained relationships and I was accused of ruining someone's personal and professional relationships with my posts and writings, I have never named any names in any of my writing, however, I was informed that people knew who it was about. That very well may be, but after thinking about this for a considerable amount of time this evening I have never lied or told an untruth about anything, so the plain and simple truth is that their actions and people witnessing it is what ruined their reputation not my writing. The moment their actions were directed at me they became my life and I write about my life. It's not my job to edit my life so that others can go on their merry way. It's my job to share my experiences of this journey every way I can. One person... ONE person has claimed my writings have harmed them.. one person who has hurt me over and over ... sorry but the dozens of people who have reached out to me about how my honesty and openness have helped them out weigh this one. I don't walk around deliberately hurting anyone that is not me or my style but I won't color coat my life either. Had their very deliberate actions not affected me maybe they would not have been in my life story in the way they are. I don't owe any explanation for any of this its just me sharing where I am and how I feel. I don't hold back about the joys in my life so why should I hold back the hurts. And no this one person is not the only person I have been hurt by in the past 9 months and she didn't mind cheering me on when I wrote about the harmful things others had done to me. The sad part.... I haven't even written all of what this one person has done. It's time to burn the bridge for good. She has been deleted and blocked from my pages so she can't send any more hurtful "friend requests" and take any more photos from my facebook. As far as I am concerned she is just someone I used to know. There is one circle we are in together and I refuse to be run away. I am just very sorry that as I was trying to extend an olive branch to make things more comfortable for everyone she was reaching out too smack me with it before I even had a chance to extend it. The odd thing I find about it all is that I have only spoken to a select few about her in weeks and that was very behind the scenes, and those knew I was praying and thinking of extended a message but before I could she did the one thing she claimed to not want to do "rock the boat" . How does one publicly post one of my photos even stating that I had taken it, on Facebook without permission knowing how I feel about that and not "rock the boat" and in the mean time go on my new Facebook account and send an accidental "friend request" sorry but this two and two add up to bullshit in my book. Personally I think it was someone's pot had been ignored a little too long and needed some drama. Hope you enjoyed it. You got me and drug me in for the last time. PS you didn't leave me it a puddle of tears this time... so me I am getting stronger which makes me feel sorry for you, to make yourself feel good you have to add more crap to my life. You see when I am not looking at you through the tears of a broken heart from from a broken friendship I see you for what you are. I will continue to pray for you. You need it.Like · · Promote · Share
You, my dear are stronger than you think you are. We all know that. I am glad you are working on yourself. Nobody expects you to be who you were, but we all know you will be the best you can. You have a huge support group of friend and family. You are never alone in this journey you are on. love you!! Xoxo
|
Random Musings from Facebook
My random status thoughts and love sent to me by others. Just a glimpse into the madness, sadness, and silliness of my mind. Archives
February 2014
Categories |