Healing Prayer.
I have a very special family member that sends these to me on an almost daily basis.. for weeks they have been right on with what I needed...maybe you have people that could use this prayer as well.. Please pass on. Much love to all!
Healing Prayer.
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Life is so unpredictable and strange. As I watch the Black Shirt challenges and challengers I feel pride for those putting in the work but have no desire to put myself through that pressure emotionally or physically at this point. I realize there may never been another opportunity for this, another challenge given, and a year ago I would have disregarded my physical or mental ability to tackle such a feat and done it regardless. (usually to the point of self injury) I am happy with my red shirt and will wear it with honor as I run/walk a half marathon this week, maybe MY challenge wasn't 100 miles in 6 weeks, but simply learning to embrace the moment you are in and strive to go farther with each step, versus never being happy enough and pushing to the point of breaking... While I may never been in the front row, or wear the black shirt of pride, I know in my heart the challenges I face in just getting out there and for right now... that's enough.
Life is so unpredictable and strange. As I watch the Black Shirt challenges and challengers I feel pride for those putting in the work but have no desire to put myself through that pressure emotionally or physically at this point. I realize there may never been another opportunity for this, another challenge given, and a year ago I would have disregarded my physical or mental ability to tackle such a feat and done it regardless. (usually to the point of self injury) I am happy with my red shirt and will wear it with honor as I run/walk a half marathon this week, maybe MY challenge wasn't 100 miles in 6 weeks, but simply learning to embrace the moment you are in and strive to go farther with each step, versus never being happy enough and pushing to the point of breaking... While I may never been in the front row, or wear the black shirt of pride, I know in my heart the challenges I face in just getting out there and for right now... thats enough.
Most people just need a little push, a little encouragement to become what God has created them to be. Be a people builder
Being successful doesn’t necessarily make you great. What makes you great is when you reach back and help somebody else become great.
Monday's stink.. period... all the things I have to be happy about and I am all shoot me.
Today is our give day at Bootcamp... We turn in our cards.. we hang them on our mirrors, our computers, in our cars. We write our goals under our give to help visualize where we want to be and to help us from "giving in to the give" My give was Pizza Rolls. It needed to be done. I have a bag in my freezer (or maybe there are 3 in there) either way I haven't touched them.
Oddly.. my give of my pizza rolls and my goal are wildly disconnected. Most of the time the goals at bootcamp, are lose 10..20..30 lbs (in my case it is usually part of mine), Run a 5k, Run a Half, Run a little faster, lift more weight.. None of these things interest nor appeal to me... at the moment. I have done those things, I KNOW I can do THOSE things again. My goal is bigger than that, heavier than that (not to diminish anyone else's goals.. all goals are difficult) my goal this camp, is to start living again, by picking up one tiny piece of this broken heart and life, by making a commitment to be there every Monday and Wednesday night and do the best that I can, even if my best today isn't what it used to be. So maybe I won't lose one pound this camp, maybe I won't get one bit faster, or be able to do more that my original number of situps and pushups... but right now making the promise to be there is larger, bigger, more challenging and much more frightening than all of those things. And maybe just maybe by the Grace of God and some really great people on October 16th I can say, I picked up that puzzle piece an I owned it. One of my favorite lines this weekend... picture: me and re grab our phones after dinner and are silent..texting, reading, fb. Henry looks at us and says "you know they got clinics for that now". Me and re put are phones down on the table quickly pretending we didn't know what he was talking about...classic!
If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary-wise; what it is it wouldn't be, and what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?
Do you ever think, that if people knew how crazy you really were that no one would ever talk to you? Love it when my kid knows me so well he tells me movie I will love! — with Dustin Taylor.
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February 2014
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