Liz explains things so well... I love each of you who have stood by me and who let me talk and write about Little Dustin and Deanna! It takes strength for you to allow me to do that as well! Much love... Much much loveHow do you even begin to explain to the rest of the world, your family and friends what it feels like to have your child die? And then add to that go on living in a world without them. If you are a parent you know I am talking about your worst nightmare. So after saying that where does a parent who has buried a child go for support? In the beginning when your child first dies everyone is there hugging you and holding you and trying to help you get through the funeral and that is all good because we need that but then when everything is over and everyday life takes over and everyone gets back to their own life’s, that is when your real journey starts.
It starts the first morning you wake up and realize your child is not there and that this is not a dream it is the beginning of your worst nightmare with no one to help or comfort you because they have all gone back to their lives, and rightfully so. Even though they love you, you are the last person they want to talk to because they are at a loss for words and there are no words that can change the fact your child is dead.
So where do you go from here? How are you ever going to find a place where you fit in again? This is where the acting comes in. You start to pretend and fake your way for a very long time because if you don’t and you break down all the time you will make people feel uncomfortable and not want to be around you, so now what do you do? If you are like me I found other like myself and talked about our dead children and what kind of headstone we brought them and how they looked in a casket and how we dressed them or if we had them cremated. These would be the topics of the day, not to many people want to talk about dead kids.
So can you see how we are lucky to be alive after our children have died? So if I act a little crazy at times please forgive me because I am just a mom trying to make it until I am with my child again but until then I want to try to make a difference and help others like myself survive the un-survivable the death of my child. I hope you will understand it takes all my strength to do that.
Love Liz
It starts the first morning you wake up and realize your child is not there and that this is not a dream it is the beginning of your worst nightmare with no one to help or comfort you because they have all gone back to their lives, and rightfully so. Even though they love you, you are the last person they want to talk to because they are at a loss for words and there are no words that can change the fact your child is dead.
So where do you go from here? How are you ever going to find a place where you fit in again? This is where the acting comes in. You start to pretend and fake your way for a very long time because if you don’t and you break down all the time you will make people feel uncomfortable and not want to be around you, so now what do you do? If you are like me I found other like myself and talked about our dead children and what kind of headstone we brought them and how they looked in a casket and how we dressed them or if we had them cremated. These would be the topics of the day, not to many people want to talk about dead kids.
So can you see how we are lucky to be alive after our children have died? So if I act a little crazy at times please forgive me because I am just a mom trying to make it until I am with my child again but until then I want to try to make a difference and help others like myself survive the un-survivable the death of my child. I hope you will understand it takes all my strength to do that.
Love Liz
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