Well this year like all the others that past (Facebook memories are good for remembering) my emotional and mental state have turned on a dime and I feel more like me. A clearer fatter and unhealthier me but me none the less.
Same stupid roller coaster. Lose weight gain it all back plus some lose weight gain it all back plus some rinse repeat.
Do I know what I need to do? Yea. Absolutely no alcohol, no sugar, no dairy, no carbs, no processed foods. So meat veggies and water. That is MUCH easier to do when the person you are cooking for is only you, but throw my dad in the mix who loses weight at the drop of a hat and it is a recipe for fatness. I have yet to figure out how to make food for him and not have the same because he doesn’t do leftovers so I would be throwing a lot away. Which I don’t think now is the thing to do.
The pics below are from last fall when I felt my best and strongest in a long time and today where I feel my fattest and weakest. This roller coaster is STUPID and completely runs my life. If I am not thinking about food I am thinking about a glass of wine or vodka and if I am not thinking about that I am thinking about how damn fat I am and that there is something mentally wrong with me that I keep doing this to myself. And yes I am ashamed and embarrassed of myself. I make myself sick.
I can’t even run because this just hurts my joints so bad.
Back at square one..... again.
With no tribe and no motivation.
PS you can go off on me if you want ... you know who you are.... I deserve it.
PSS I don’t know who else needs to see this but you aren’t alone! Just got the overwhelming feeling this wasn’t just about me.
PSSS Mom I am not trying to make you sad!
Same stupid roller coaster. Lose weight gain it all back plus some lose weight gain it all back plus some rinse repeat.
Do I know what I need to do? Yea. Absolutely no alcohol, no sugar, no dairy, no carbs, no processed foods. So meat veggies and water. That is MUCH easier to do when the person you are cooking for is only you, but throw my dad in the mix who loses weight at the drop of a hat and it is a recipe for fatness. I have yet to figure out how to make food for him and not have the same because he doesn’t do leftovers so I would be throwing a lot away. Which I don’t think now is the thing to do.
The pics below are from last fall when I felt my best and strongest in a long time and today where I feel my fattest and weakest. This roller coaster is STUPID and completely runs my life. If I am not thinking about food I am thinking about a glass of wine or vodka and if I am not thinking about that I am thinking about how damn fat I am and that there is something mentally wrong with me that I keep doing this to myself. And yes I am ashamed and embarrassed of myself. I make myself sick.
I can’t even run because this just hurts my joints so bad.
Back at square one..... again.
With no tribe and no motivation.
PS you can go off on me if you want ... you know who you are.... I deserve it.
PSS I don’t know who else needs to see this but you aren’t alone! Just got the overwhelming feeling this wasn’t just about me.
PSSS Mom I am not trying to make you sad!
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