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Come on beautiful... 

10/27/2016

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Rough evening.. Rough morning..

I really need to just shake it off and just keep on. I have absolutely no reason to be on the verge of tears but I am.

During Group Power last night I looked in the mirror and all I saw was the fat girl struggling.. glancing around it didn't take but a second to realize that was because I was the fat girl struggling. With each dead raise row all I could see in the mirror was the huge fat roll in my way. Drag raises.. start at the bottom of my fat and stop at the top. It is discouraging. I just don't want to be the fat girl. It didn't matter that I had already done one killer work out earlier in the day.. I wanted that work out to be killer too! And I want to look good going it.. and I don't.

Came home had a great dinner.. early to bed.. early to rise... and on to bootcamp.

I was completely discombobulated. Missing the bag in kicks. Unable to perform moves correctly.. and just ended up leaving feeling discouraged and disappointed in myself. I am better than this. I am stronger than this. I will not get to where I need to be by half assing moves but that was all I had in me.

So what do I do from here.

Well I go to Zumba tonight.. try not to look in the mirrors and keep on keeping on.

Peace and Love
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