I hope you all had a wonderful day yesterday! I really have nothing to complain about my day, I overcame some obstacles (more on that in a second) and I took my longest ride on Penny (which was crazy hard) and I got flagged on the book of faces for false information. I am going to attempt to type out the quote that was flagged again. "A meaningful life is about being rich, being popular, being highly educated or being perfect, it's about being real, being humble, being strong, and being able to share ourselves and touch the lives of others". I told a friend last night that after reading it I could see how that could be false for some, because they truly believe it is about the money and power, but what got me.. what REALLY got me.. is that when I researched how to appeal that (I couldn't figure it out) I ended up learning that someone had to actually report the post in order to have it flagged (I am still deep down hoping for a algorithm that went wonky but I am not seeing that) In the end it just made me sad. Number 1 that someone felt so badly in their own life and Number 2 that anyone that is able to see that post (it was not public) is on my "friends" list and would take the time to make multiple clicks to report me for being .... *gasp* positive. I mean I get it.. i am NOT everyone's cup of tea and that is quite alright but come on.. If it is you.. if you dislike my post that much.. if you find yourself seething with anger when you read my words, first off man up and tell me yourself, second just stop reading. Is it that hard? I can promise you it is only going to get more positive from here!
I didn't sleep super well last night, had a hard time falling asleep likely because my brain was whirling from the above, so I did something I have not done in WEEKS.... I hit the snooze... TWICE. I just couldn't manage to get my feet on the floor this morning. I think sometimes we just need those extra moments to reset for the day and that is ok, we don't have to get up and get the worm every single morning.
I am again all over the place this morning. not a well thought out post, I didn't let this one marinate. I just simplly needed to get my thoughts out there today. Kinda like my sleep, sometimes we just need those emotional releases and that is ok too!
Circling back around to my obstacle I got over yesterday. On Monday I took the jet ski out on it's first ride of the season, she did ok but something didn't sound quite right (ed and I heard different things) so when he went to looking he found it, cracked manifold. Fun times. It was cold out there anyway so we spent the remainder of the day attempting to remove it so we could replace it. (don't roll your eyes I don't mind getting dirty and wielding a wrench.) So we worked and worked and searched for each bolt and we got them all except this one impossible to reach pain in the ass! I bet we spent an hour on that thing alone. He tried, I tried, back and forth back and forth, my arms and hands are actually bruised from trying to reach that thing. Finally we both said forget it and in the garage she went!
I had a choice here. I could leave that thing sitting right there until next weekend or yesterday after work, and all my chores were done I could walk out there and take another crack at it. I had 20 minutes of time left over so I said, I can at least go look.
I opened the garage door, flipped on the lights, and there she sat looming with her tightly stuck impossible to reach nut. The problem had not just gone away, she was right there, but with the added bonus of the lights in the garage are not very bright and I coudln't see very good. I stood there. She sat there. I stood there some more and she didn't budge. I literally thought to myself "What am I doing wrong here?" I reached back in my archive of useless crap and it came to me. I was applying the wrong solution to the problem! Well duh but it was then that I realized that I needed to rethink, the day before everything we tried was to end in putting pressure on that nut to break it loose. That we had to get an angle on the wrench that allowed for Ed to use strength, but that was not even close to what needed to happen. It needed consistency. It needed my small hands. It needed about 20 small taps and not one huge push. In those 20 minutes I had, I accomplished the goal, nut was removed, I closed up shop and went to the ball game with a little bit of pride. And of course the whole thing got my brain to spinning.
How many times in life do we do that? We have a problem, doesn't matter what it is, and we go at it all gang busters the same exact way we have each and every time only to end up not succeeding. What do we then, try again and again and again, only to end up beaten up and bruised and STILL not succeeding. We fail to take the few moments to ponder if there could be a different solution to the outcome you desire. To quote Jack Sparrow here "The problem isn't the problem the problem is your attitude about the problem."
I am so guilty of this, so very guilty. I have known for so long what exactly a lot of my problems were, but I thought the solution was "POWER THROUGH!!! Don't ask for help. Only you can help you, no one else will understand" and year after year after year that is exactly what I applied to my problems resulting in deeper and deeper and deeper depression, mental illness, and weight gain. I am so utterly grateful that I realize today it is so very ok to be wrong and back up and try a differently!!!
Signing off today with this, is there something in your life that you are just banging your head against? Can you take a break and revisit it tomorrow, a few days, a week from now with a fresh set of eyes?
Peace Love and Light