Give the heavens above...

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin'
Lovin' might be a mistake, but it's worth makin'
Don't let some Hellbent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to sellin' out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance...

It's National Siblings day so person after person has revealed to me on Facebook. I stopped looking. So many happy smiling faces. Little kids from the 70's. Funny pics from the 80's. Recent photos...

That's all perfect for someone who's heart is not in a bazillion pieces. Mine is... some of these kids are.. some of these kids are in heaven.. some of these kids are oblivious to the day.. some of these kids are not acknowledging the day because they know it will probably upset me.

I don't know when life will be back together and something as simple and stupid as a made up holiday doesn't yank my heart out of my chest.

February.. March.. April.. just filled with memory after memory after memory.. last texts.. last messages.. last birthdays.. Easter.. Siblings day.. angelversaries.. I have tried and tired to fight through them.. just day after day keep going.. but right now.. right this minute it is all falling apart.

It's times like this that most people have a sibling to turn to... yea not so much.