So when there is something going on in your body and you know it is going on and there is absolutely not a darn thing you can do about it but wait it is FRUSTRATING! So here it is peeps.. I now have zero clue if I am crazy or not. Well ok wait back up I am crazy but I don't know what is CAUSING the crazy. (I am going somewhere with this today so just bare with me ok).
Week before last as you all know I was given a diagnosis from a Dr. Which was GREAT! Finally something that we can deal with something we can aim towards fixing something we can control. Just one little problem, the new med they put me on I had some kinda of crazy reaction to. I should notate here that my body does all kinds of crazy things with medicine, if there is a 3% chance that something will go wrong while taking it.. I am the 3%. Ambien to sleep.. 3% chance of insomnia, I get the insomnia side effect, 3% chance of birth control failure.. you guys have met Drake right? I think you get my point here my body is jacked up. So Saturday morning after a night of racing heart, wanting to climb the walls, and the almost uncontrollable urge to rip my own skin off, I went to the ER. This test was done, that test was done, and I know that the cause of all that craziness was the medication because I stopped taking it and I don't feel the need to remove my epidermis any longer. YAY right? But wait.. there's more.
My blood work came out all wonky, (imagine that) and they had to do a CT Scan because some number wasn't quite right. Which by the way can go up due to stress and any type of inflammation in the body. Anyhoo.. I don't have a blood clot at least not in my chest, which is rather confusing because can't a blood clot be anywhere in your body and then move and maybe today there is one in my chest region. Oh hell I don't know. Anyway that was ruled out as an issue, however, there found this little alien living in my adrenal gland (which by the way is right over your kidneys not in your brain) so off they send me to follow up with my regular doctor about this little alien. Let me insert here that you should not give a crazy person a hand full of papers that have ABNORMAL in big red letters all over it and access to the internets. I have been dying since last Saturday. I had a follow up on Monday morning with my PCP and was assured that the abnormal on the blood tests were no big deal and that the top line number isn't really that concerning it is the bottom lines of what is working IN the cells you have, and there is a chance that my blood counts just aren't like normal peoples... imagine that. It was decided to get better pictures of George.. lets call him George all aliens need a name and an MRI has been scheduled for next Thursday. I was sent home with assurance that all was ok, I wasn't dying of some kind of crazy disease. So lets shift focus from all the abnormal blood numbers and lets look up stuff about George. Because George is real. George is there.
So enter internets again. You now what I find out. If my adrenal glands are acting up GUESS WHAT.. they will make you crazy. They will make you fat in your tummy. They will make you depressed. They will make you tired. They will make you moody. Guess what else I also found out, handing someone a diagnosis of bipolar disorder without months of evaluation based on the patient, interviews with family and so forth is worth absolutely nothing. All those things I checked off on that little sheet of paper they handed me two weeks ago could all be caused by George, and if not necessarily George, George's home. All that stuff is supposed to be ruled out before you tell someone they are crazy. It wasn't. Especially since the medication changes they make with the diagnosis of bipolar disorder can complete set off other physical problems you may have.
I am freaking tired. I am tired of chasing what is wrong with me. I am tired of being tired. I am tired of crying. I am tired of not having any control over what is going on with my body and NOT KNOWING WHAT IS WRONG WITH IT!
Peace out..
Re
PS I am getting even MORE tired of trying to get Weebly to work right!
Week before last as you all know I was given a diagnosis from a Dr. Which was GREAT! Finally something that we can deal with something we can aim towards fixing something we can control. Just one little problem, the new med they put me on I had some kinda of crazy reaction to. I should notate here that my body does all kinds of crazy things with medicine, if there is a 3% chance that something will go wrong while taking it.. I am the 3%. Ambien to sleep.. 3% chance of insomnia, I get the insomnia side effect, 3% chance of birth control failure.. you guys have met Drake right? I think you get my point here my body is jacked up. So Saturday morning after a night of racing heart, wanting to climb the walls, and the almost uncontrollable urge to rip my own skin off, I went to the ER. This test was done, that test was done, and I know that the cause of all that craziness was the medication because I stopped taking it and I don't feel the need to remove my epidermis any longer. YAY right? But wait.. there's more.
My blood work came out all wonky, (imagine that) and they had to do a CT Scan because some number wasn't quite right. Which by the way can go up due to stress and any type of inflammation in the body. Anyhoo.. I don't have a blood clot at least not in my chest, which is rather confusing because can't a blood clot be anywhere in your body and then move and maybe today there is one in my chest region. Oh hell I don't know. Anyway that was ruled out as an issue, however, there found this little alien living in my adrenal gland (which by the way is right over your kidneys not in your brain) so off they send me to follow up with my regular doctor about this little alien. Let me insert here that you should not give a crazy person a hand full of papers that have ABNORMAL in big red letters all over it and access to the internets. I have been dying since last Saturday. I had a follow up on Monday morning with my PCP and was assured that the abnormal on the blood tests were no big deal and that the top line number isn't really that concerning it is the bottom lines of what is working IN the cells you have, and there is a chance that my blood counts just aren't like normal peoples... imagine that. It was decided to get better pictures of George.. lets call him George all aliens need a name and an MRI has been scheduled for next Thursday. I was sent home with assurance that all was ok, I wasn't dying of some kind of crazy disease. So lets shift focus from all the abnormal blood numbers and lets look up stuff about George. Because George is real. George is there.
So enter internets again. You now what I find out. If my adrenal glands are acting up GUESS WHAT.. they will make you crazy. They will make you fat in your tummy. They will make you depressed. They will make you tired. They will make you moody. Guess what else I also found out, handing someone a diagnosis of bipolar disorder without months of evaluation based on the patient, interviews with family and so forth is worth absolutely nothing. All those things I checked off on that little sheet of paper they handed me two weeks ago could all be caused by George, and if not necessarily George, George's home. All that stuff is supposed to be ruled out before you tell someone they are crazy. It wasn't. Especially since the medication changes they make with the diagnosis of bipolar disorder can complete set off other physical problems you may have.
I am freaking tired. I am tired of chasing what is wrong with me. I am tired of being tired. I am tired of crying. I am tired of not having any control over what is going on with my body and NOT KNOWING WHAT IS WRONG WITH IT!
Peace out..
Re
PS I am getting even MORE tired of trying to get Weebly to work right!
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