How my hour long lunch turned into 3 and a half hours and my day got absolutely RIDICULOUS.
My original lunch Friday involved practicing a funeral service.
Why you ask.. because they chose me of all people to perform my aunts funeral .. the whole funeral from the first Let us Pray to the final Amen. In case you are wondering performing the funeral also involves choosing prayers and writing a eulogy, and they still chose me for some reason. I need to remember to ask why they chose me after this is all over. What I thought was a simple print read through turned into updating and changing things and yet another practice run.. (the service is approximately 30 minutes long so two run throughs was already an hour.. add in the reprints and edits.. my lunch became two hours.. (update on this. It went well. People were kind and said I did really good)
Not bad right? On my way back home I call my dad, who in all of his wonderful wisdom decided to burn a large pile of brush today (he is ok don’t worry) but he wasn’t answering his phone… at all. Ok quick run by to make sure he is ok. Yup a ok just didn’t hear the phone over the bob cat (mini bulldozer in case you are wondering) he was on.. I literally can not make this stuff up!
As I was leaving his road there was a woman who was acting bizarrely so I stopped to make sure she was ok. The story that she relayed immediately made me realize something was VERY WRONG. She was either under the influence of some powerful substance, having a mental break, or had a head injury. Her story that she relayed had ex boyfriends, missing dogs, murdered dogs, ghost dogs, her best friend the dog, a car accident, and a drive about looking up in the trees because she felt that is where her dog was. I called our local sheriff’s office.. someone should be right with me right? We live in the middle of no where.. Even if you were on the right end of the county you are talking 10 minutes to get to me, add in turns and twist and you are talking almost 30 minutes of tailing a very odd woman. Keep in mind I am in my jeep… MY PURPLE JEEP.. tailing a woman who is driving all of 7 mile per hour. As I am cutting in and out of service because I am in the middle of nowhere in the middle of NO WHERE I hear over the phone.. “Hey ask her if she is driving her purple Jeep.” Wouldn’t you know it.. high school boyfriend is sitting right beside the dispatcher I am on the call with!
Finally I see blue lights, I have never been so relieved to see blue lights! The officer pulls safely around me yet she does not notice him. Here I was worried she was going to spot me and this chick doesn’t even see the blue lights! After I quick blurt of the siren she is pulled over safely by the officer and I breathe a sigh of relief as I can finally head home….
Then I got behind a tractor.
I hope this made you at least laugh at the shear ridiculousness of my life.
My original lunch Friday involved practicing a funeral service.
Why you ask.. because they chose me of all people to perform my aunts funeral .. the whole funeral from the first Let us Pray to the final Amen. In case you are wondering performing the funeral also involves choosing prayers and writing a eulogy, and they still chose me for some reason. I need to remember to ask why they chose me after this is all over. What I thought was a simple print read through turned into updating and changing things and yet another practice run.. (the service is approximately 30 minutes long so two run throughs was already an hour.. add in the reprints and edits.. my lunch became two hours.. (update on this. It went well. People were kind and said I did really good)
Not bad right? On my way back home I call my dad, who in all of his wonderful wisdom decided to burn a large pile of brush today (he is ok don’t worry) but he wasn’t answering his phone… at all. Ok quick run by to make sure he is ok. Yup a ok just didn’t hear the phone over the bob cat (mini bulldozer in case you are wondering) he was on.. I literally can not make this stuff up!
As I was leaving his road there was a woman who was acting bizarrely so I stopped to make sure she was ok. The story that she relayed immediately made me realize something was VERY WRONG. She was either under the influence of some powerful substance, having a mental break, or had a head injury. Her story that she relayed had ex boyfriends, missing dogs, murdered dogs, ghost dogs, her best friend the dog, a car accident, and a drive about looking up in the trees because she felt that is where her dog was. I called our local sheriff’s office.. someone should be right with me right? We live in the middle of no where.. Even if you were on the right end of the county you are talking 10 minutes to get to me, add in turns and twist and you are talking almost 30 minutes of tailing a very odd woman. Keep in mind I am in my jeep… MY PURPLE JEEP.. tailing a woman who is driving all of 7 mile per hour. As I am cutting in and out of service because I am in the middle of nowhere in the middle of NO WHERE I hear over the phone.. “Hey ask her if she is driving her purple Jeep.” Wouldn’t you know it.. high school boyfriend is sitting right beside the dispatcher I am on the call with!
Finally I see blue lights, I have never been so relieved to see blue lights! The officer pulls safely around me yet she does not notice him. Here I was worried she was going to spot me and this chick doesn’t even see the blue lights! After I quick blurt of the siren she is pulled over safely by the officer and I breathe a sigh of relief as I can finally head home….
Then I got behind a tractor.
I hope this made you at least laugh at the shear ridiculousness of my life.
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