Each of us has faith, yes each and every person has faith. If not we would all remain slugs who never learned to walk, talk, or feed ourselves. Think about it.. as you are taking your first step you have hope that you won't fall, that all your hard work will get you to where you need to be, you put faith in your parents they will help you up if you do stumble, and you continue to have faith you will get it even if you have to try again. If we didn't we would all still be crawling. Just look how far you came on that little bit of hope and faith! Good Job You!
Life is basically a series of "Hey I am trying to learn how to walk over here!"s. We have hope that we are doing what is right to get us where we want to be, that all of our hard work will pay off, we hope that we won't fall, and we have faith in a Higher Power or even ourselves that we will be able to get back up and try again if we stumble. I lost all that faith and I had no hope.
I didn't believe enough in myself to even believe that God would help me and I stumbled along for a very long time. Each and every step I made even when it was helping others in need ended in more tumbles and scraped knees. It ended with me screaming like a pre toddler "WHY DO YOU KEEP LETTING ME FALL! WHY AREN'T YOU HELPING ME? HAVEN'T YOU HURT ME ENOUGH? YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING!!" The problem with all of that is I was screaming into the darkness. I didn't believe I had the strength to make the steps, why would anyone else? I sank so very low that I didn't believe I deserved help from any source. You know what happens when you believe you don't deserve help or love? When it is offered you don't even see it. You don't see the hand reaching out to you to steady your next step, you are too busy feeding the darkness.
I am sitting here right now with a few issues that this portion of my journey has caused. I am over weight and kinda homeless. I distanced myself from my friends, family and my church. So here I am dusting myself off from the rough trail I have been on seeing what I can salvage out of the rubble that has been my life for a few years now.
There are rays of hope that have broken through, friends who still believe in me, family that still loves me, and an answer that God gave that I have faith won't be taken away. So what's my point....
When you're going through hell keep on going, have faith that a hand will reach out and steady your next steps.